6 month cycles
On November 27, 2017 by Michelle LoveTwo years since this photo was taken….so hard to believe. The hardest time of the year for me is September through March, then I spend the next 6 months recovering, just to go back into the same cycle. So many especially ‘crapaversaries’ (as another angel-mom friend puts it) happen during these 6 months. BJ’s
It was a simple question, right?
On October 24, 2017 by Michelle LoveI was notified by Leslie, the Editor at Lake Norman Woman Magazine, that my charity was selected to be included in their Charity Issue this December, 2017. I’ve been a contributing writer for the magazine for just over a year now. I’m very aware of the process of selection for articles in the other months
Lincoln Times-News article ….by Michelle Bernard
On September 27, 2017 by Michelle LoveI spent an hour of Michelle Bernard’s time on the phone on Monday, Sept. 25. I told her most of our story, crying through most of the hour’s discussion. I felt like she understood the hell that we went through, that BJ went through – at least some of it. She really did a great
5-years since diagnosis
On September 13, 2017 by Michelle Love5 years ago today, I was told that my child had cancer… The *most curable* type of childhood cancer – Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. Immediately after being admitted to the hospital, he received his first blood transfusion. If you’ve never witnessed the change in a person with a desperate need for blood, I
18 months and the war continues
On September 7, 2017 by Michelle LoveBJ left us 18 months ago. I really never thought that I would have had to be here without him for this long. (Read whatever you want into that.) It’s been hell. There have been some good days sprinkled in over the past 18 months, but this grief overshadows everything. I’ve been happy at times,
The Gap by Michael Crenlinsten
On September 6, 2017 by Michelle LoveThe gap between those who have lost children and those who have not is profoundly difficult to bridge. No one, whose children are well and intact, can be expected to understand what parents who have lost children have absorbed, what they bear. Our child now comes to us through every blade of grass, every crack in the sidewalk, every bowl of breakfast cereal, every kid on
Rainbow promises
On August 20, 2017 by Michelle LoveGetting ready to leave the house for an appointment earlier, I looked outside to see if the rain had stopped. The sun was shining but it was still raining. I told Carly that there had to be a rainbow, so I went out the front door to look. Sun, rain but no rainbow. I went to the back
Relapse.
On May 22, 2017 by Michelle LoveMay 22, 2015 changed us. BJ’s leukemia was back. It had never really left. Like the coward it is, it mutated and hid until it had enough numbers to show itself. It was a direct blow to the future we planned and sparked a battle like none other before it. It turned us into raging
Going to the grave in my PJs
On May 9, 2017 by Michelle LoveI’ve been having some rough days. Saturday was particularly bad. I went to his grave that morning in my pajamas with my dogs. I just wanted to be there. I know he’s not there, really, but sometimes I just have to go and stay for a while. I cried and cried, and again, for the millionth
These Shoes
On April 8, 2017 by Michelle LoveThese shoes. #toomanywalkingintheseshoes#morethan4 #childhoodcancerawareness#heavygrief
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