The Gap by Michael Crenlinsten
On September 6, 2017 by Michelle LoveThe gap between those who have lost children and those who have not is profoundly difficult to bridge. No one, whose children are well and intact, can be expected to understand what parents who have lost children have absorbed, what they bear. Our child now comes to us through every blade of grass, every crack in the sidewalk, every bowl of breakfast cereal, every kid on Read More
A year at home
On February 20, 2017 by Michelle LoveA year ago today we left our “home away from home” (Levine Children’s Hospital), and were transported home. We were blessed with another 15 days together. We’re still fighting, BJ….we will never stop. I miss you so much. A year ago: Saturday, February 20, 2016 After 90 consecutive days in the hospital, we will be Read More
BJ’s poem: “Cancer sucks”
On September 30, 2016 by Michelle LoveBJ posted this poem on September 30, 2015.His words…..💔 It’s BJ again and I figured since it’s the last day of Childhood Cancer Awareness month I’d post this. C: Caring: people caring for youA: Asking and answering so many questionsN: Nurses by your side to give you something for nausea or pain.C: Cautious, cause your Read More
Do you even care?
On August 29, 2016 by Michelle LoveThis should be an entirely different picture. But it is just this …and honestly, it freaking sucks…worse than anything could possibly suck, and then sucks a whole lot more. All day everyday, not just the first day of school. But these times that really push the “should have been” to the forefront, there just are Read More
Back to School…Should Have Been
On August 29, 2016 by Michelle LoveThis should be an entirely different picture. But it is just this …and honestly, it freaking sucks…worse than anything could possibly suck, and then sucks a whole lot more. All day everyday, not just the first day of school. But these times that really push the “should have been” to the forefront, there just are Read More
Knocked Down – Grief 68 days
On May 13, 2016 by Michelle LoveThe crashing wave of grief. It’s so torturously random. It doesn’t care when it hits…it just does. Just driving to pick up my daughter and her friends from school, it sneaked up on me and I physically felt knocked to my knees, nauseated, and struggled to hold back the rush of tears I knew were Read More
29 days Empty
On April 5, 2016 by Michelle LoveIt’s just that….emptiness everywhere. Empty. Empty bedroom. Empty laundry basket. Empty place at the table. Empty spot on the couch. Empty arms. HUGE empty hole in my heart. Read More
What’s the Plan?!
On March 28, 2016 by Michelle LoveHe didn’t save BJ. He didn’t heal him in the way we thought He would, or even thought He should. It’s been 3 weeks now. I’ve never been so broken or felt so lost. I’ve been sad, and distraught, and solemn and sullen. I’ve had fleeting moments of laughter with no tears, and laughter through Read More
Headed home…Saturday, February 20, 2016
On February 20, 2016 by Michelle LoveSaturday, February 20, 2016 After 90 consecutive days in the hospital, we will be going home today with the support of Kids Path. That is the kid’s version of hospice. I hate that word and what it means to me as a mom of the most amazing son, and to Carly, who adores her big Read More
68 days inpatient – Tuesday, January 26, 2016
On January 27, 2016 by Michelle LoveTuesday, January 26, 2016…68 days in the hospital I hope the blinatumomab is kicking leukemia’s butt as hard as it’s kicking BJ’s. Over the past few days, he has had fevers, feels achy all over, having joint pain, and just feels bad. He is on a liter of oxygen, and has had several blood and Read More
Recent Comments